Ethics Information

Dont Hate Them Because Theyre Beautiful


Tonight I'm going out with two extremely impressive ladies who I am introducing to one another. They are both GORGEOUS, in their mid 20s and both incredibly intelligent. One is divorced with kids and is probably one of the most flawless and incredibly beautiful women I've ever met, the other is single and possibly one of the most fashionable and forward thinking women I've ever met.

One of these ladies I've been coaching for over a year, the other is a new client. I thought that they would really enjoy each other because they are both serious about their work, both make a lot of money, are very smart and they have another few things in common.

They FLIRT!

Okay, let me get one thing straight. Neither of them HAS to flirt. Men would fall all over either of them just because of their beauty alone. But they both have very outgoing personalities and are charming in addition to being smart. They also have ANOTHER thing in common.

WOMEN DESPISE THEM.

I know! Can you believe it!? Women hate both of these ladies because of their beauty and their talent. Not only do women despise them but they are torturous to them! They talk behind their backs, they spread rumors and they treat them mean.

CAT FIGHT, CAT FIGHT.. I can just hear all of you guys now! Oh PLEASE! I know enough about you guys to know that you have envy too, but you just handle it differently.. like try to injure each other on the basketball court, or kill each other on the golf course. Okay, maybe not as much, but men are naturally competitive and it drives you harder. You often feel you have control over your destiny since you are often judging yourself on your income.

Women? We get judged on our looks first, and THEN everything else.

The thing about both of these women is that they are some of the nicest people I know. They are fun and lively and smart. They are ambitious and they are interesting to talk to. I have enjoyed getting to know both of them very much and I just know that if women would take some time to get to know them, they'd enjoy their company. But instead, the women demean themselves by displaying raging jealousy and use up all of their energy in a negative way? instead of being productive.

Okay, let me address the fact that they flirt. What I've counseled at least one of the ladies to do is to be personable and friendly when work isn't the primary focus, but when presenting to an audience, especially in a mixed group, professionalism is the best bet.

One rule of thumb: Don't flirt at the office. Okay, if you do flirt, then just don't flirt in front of other women. That brings up insecurity in other women. And DON"T flirt with another woman's man when she's there. That is the ULTIMATE "no no"!

So I have two challenges here for ladies. If you are beautiful and in business A) Be better than everyone else at your job. Come early, stay late and be committed to your company. If people are going to be talking about you (and they will) at least they won't be able to say that you don't work hard. You know that they'll be saying things like that you "slept your way to the top" and that can be damaging to your reputation. So be the #1 employee in your department and do whatever you can do education wise to stay on top.

Next, be a supporter to other women. You are a target for hatred, jealousy and other women's insecurity. Whatever you can do to pull women together or serving them will help women get over your major issue of beauty. If you are a mom and don't have time to throw networking get "togethers", then at least make sure you have a few female friends in your back pocket to commiserate with. I've encouraged these women to get on a sports team so they aren't seen as the "pretty and successful" ones there. They can be sweating it out looking gross like everyone else.

"Although I bet these two women don't sweat. They're too perfect. You should see them, I bet they never have ANY problems.. I have had to work SO much harder than them and I never had anyone coaching me when I was THEIR age. Hmmmmph!"

Ooopss!! I guess I even have to catch myself at times. I remind myself that we are all on our own paths and that while beauty and money may make life a bit easier, they can make it a bit more challenging too.

And you know I LLLLLLOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVE a challenge!

For more information: mary@marygardner.com or Web: www.marygardner.com

Mary Gardner, The Charisma Coach! is an Executive Communications Consultant and Trainer. She works with, coaches and trains individuals, sales teams, executives, and celebrities. She owned and operated one of the first coaching institutions on the east coast, CCI, in NYC, Philly and NJ. Mary has appeared on ABC's 20/20 and has self published a book on public speaking. Mary is married to Sway and is mommy to Jeremy 5, and lives in Orlando, FL.


MORE RESOURCES:

Boston Globe

Ethics board charges Joseph DeNucci for landing cousin a job
Boston Herald
The State Ethics Commission, in an “order to show cause” akin to an indictment, said DeNucci ordered subordinates to interview Gaetano “Buster” Spezzano, ...
Ethics regulators say DeNucci had conflict of interestBoston Globe
Ethics Commission charges Auditor DeNucci with violating state lawSwampscott Reporter
'Proud' DeNucci will fight charge over hiring cousinDaily News Transcript
Somerville Journal -WWLP 22News -Wicked Local Brockton
all 35 news articles »


Hunterdon County Democrat - NJ.com

Christie unveils package of ethics proposals
Philadelphia Inquirer
The governor had promised ethics reform on the campaign trail while touting his record of prosecuting more than 130 public officials for corruption. ...
New Jersey Governor Unveils Ethics ReformsNew York Times
Gov. Christie sets sights on reforming financial disclosure laws for legislatureThe Star-Ledger - NJ.com
New Jersey Governor Proposes Tougher Ethics RulesCBS 3
Gov Monitor -NJ TODAY -myCentralJersy.com
all 268 news articles »


Globe and Mail

Media ethics teacher offers advice on covering the Quran-burning
USA Today
Should journalists cover the Quran-burning story? Are they giving undue publicity to a "lone voice with a tiny following"? Many in Gainesville, Fla., ...
The Ethics of Reporting on the Quran BurningWUSF 89.7 News
Quran burning cancelled as media backs offBaltimore Sun (blog)
Quran Burning: Muslim religion preaches peace, not terrorismWDAY
NewsBusters (blog)
all 11,823 news articles »


Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)

Roy Barnes unveils plan for state government ethics reform
Examiner.com
Today, Georgia Democratic gubernatorial candidate Roy Barnes unveiled a plan to reform state government ethics standards, in a speech in front of the ...
Barnes' ethics plan has Deal in mindAtlanta Journal Constitution (blog)
With Plan, Barnes Attacks Deal On EthicsWABE
Barnes touts ethics plan to boost disclosureWashington Examiner
Charlton County Herald -Online Athens -CNN Political Ticker (blog)
all 67 news articles »


Seattle Post Intelligencer

Rangel undeterred by ethics charges, grudge match
The Associated Press
Charles Rangel, battered by ethics charges and stripped of his chairmanship of the tax-writing House Ways and Means Committee, defending his seat against ...
Rangel in Grudge Match with Legendary Harlem Predecessor's SonNBC New York
Rangel on reelection: 'I'd be heckling, too'The Hill (blog)
Rangel Plowing Ahead of Rivals in Latest Fundraising RoundPolitic365 (blog)
CU Columbia Spectator
all 66 news articles »


Montgomery County Courier

Clean up ethics or limit terms
San Antonio Express
Short of real ethics reform, term limits might be the only way to run off politicians so plainly for sale that folks with money and a stake in government ...
Perry pounces on White's connection to MetroHouston Chronicle

all 186 news articles »


Ethics petitioners pick up the pace
Salt Lake Tribune
... weeks out from the April 15 deadline, volunteers for Utahns for Ethical Government (UEG) are scrambling to keep alive their ethics-reform initiative. ...
Petition may let Utahns vote on ethics reformSalt Lake Tribune

all 2 news articles »


GPB

State school board OKs ethics policy
Bizjournals.com
The state Board of Education adopted a model ethics policy Thursday covering a variety of issues, including conflicts of interest. The board's action stems ...
New ethics, conflict of interest policies set for local school boardsAtlanta Journal Constitution
Howard County school board: More revisions needed on ethics policyExplore Howard County
State School Board Adopts Local RulesGPB
WTVM -Lexington Dispatch -Rome News Tribune
all 24 news articles »


On Ethics: Withholding meds from poor man tough to swallow
Houston Chronicle
Q: I work for a nonprofit organization that sometimes provides limited funds for our clients' prescriptions. An impoverished client hoped we ...



OregonLive.com

What's a conflict of interest: Considering the scope of state ethics laws
OregonLive.com
If Hayes becomes Mrs. Kitzhaber, of course, the ethics laws are clear in requiring disclosure and avoiding conflicts of interest. ...

and more »

Google News

home | site map
© 2006